January 2011
42 posts
Fatherly affections
Holding hands while running back to the car in the rain, my daddy turns to me and say “I run like a real man, you run like a penguin.”
Too much heed
///I wish we were going somewhere. Or am I just something to pass your time?
We're two sides of a coin
I love you because I need you is not the same as I need you because I love you.
Oddest coincidences? Both L and M telling me they dreamt of me twice in a row some days back.
Made to be broken
List.
1. I see now that I have made so many mistakes, that my mindset was wholly and painfully wrong. But are there still chances to make up for what I have done? I guess this is me reaping what I have sown. I like to think that I am handling it okay, but at the occasional moment it hits me hard and I feel all the wind knocked out of me. This is so difficult.
2. I wonder if this eats at you as...
Easy come and easily gone
Aww yes thankyou very much :)
Lesbigay…sometimes you render me speechless, and I don’t know if I should laugh or hit you with a frying pan. (And I know I am better than all of your friends, why else would I be your BESTfriend?!)
-
I am sick of this. I am fucking sick of you criticising me and putting me down on everything, from my friends to the clothes I wear to even the way I define perfection. You use your microscopic narrow mindedness to judge everything, and you ALWAYS fucking make me feel like shit. I do not need your fucking validation and I do not need your approval but I am fucking tired of you making me feel like...
When there is nothing left, you'll always have me
I never knew how much I could miss you until you are not here anymore.
There is nothing that can beat the feeling of seeing your texts the moment I wake up, and hearing the smile in your voice when you bid me goodnight. I feel like you keep me safe in your pocket.
There is nothing more to what it is, and yet there is nothing less than a safe, warm and loved place I can always stay.
Last of me
In an uncharacteristic show of ‘love’, Lesbigay called me yesterday to tell me he misses me and demanded a play date. Of course he had to tell me he only thought of me when he saw garbage -.- Why so childish when I know he secretly loves me very very much?!
(Haha Lesbigay!)
I am staying over at my grandmother’s place for a few nights. She is so adorable, she decided not to...
That you and I could never be
I wish you bluebirds in the spring/ To give your heart a song to sing/ And then a kiss, but more than this
I wish you love
And in July a lemonade/ To cool you in some leafy glade/ I wish you health/ But more than wealth
I wish you love
I wish you shelter from the storm/ A cozy fire to keep you warm/ But most of all when snowflakes fall
I wish you love
I wish you love by Rachel Yamagata
“We were the people who were not in the papers. We lived in the blank white...”
– “Handmaid’s Tale” Margaret Atwood (via allirrelephant)
ca-pri-cious:
“I felt that I was leaving part of myself behind, and that wherever I went afterwards I should feel the lack of it, and search for it hopelessly, as ghosts are said to do.”
Evelyn Waugh
Keeping it sane
You know, between the two of us, we could have had the world.
Free as the birds chained to the sky
Finally a short conversation with Lesbigay, where he had to give me bite sized updates because I was rushing out the door. I saved my news for the next time we talk, which is tentatively tomorrow though I am still not sure if either of us can make it. But I think we have settled into our routine, and there is no weirdness of feeling like strangers even though we have allowed time and distance to...
Replies
My ASK function is currently not working, so I am going to reply in a post here instead.
Comment directed at this post,
“When you left, I cried;
As I cried, the city rained tears”
And question directed at this post,
“Sometimes you wish she was who?
- your favorite stalker”
It was lyrics taken off a song, it meant nothing more ^^
Sometimes I wish she was you
Random photos from my film cameras:
Phuket/ Red shophouses/ The bestie and I/ My favourite dessert/ Beer advertisment/ Jonker Walk/ Rings I have grown out of wearing now
If I could rewind time
For my stalker/fan AFB ^^
If I could rewind time and time was a movie, I would rewind our story to the opening credits and watch over and over again how our paths crossed and we fell in love. I would watch and remember how I felt the first time you looked at me with that look in your eyes and the first time your hands brushed lightly against mine. I will remember the first time our lips met when...
I guess we never really did move on
Why is it that you always only ask me to stay after I want to walk away?
“You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late,...”
– Captain Wentworth, (Persuasion, by Jane Austen)
Empty folder
The rest of my printscreens are gone FUCK. How to retrieve how to retrieve??!!
On a sidenote, 4:31 am already but I still can’t fall asleep why.
“The world you desire can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible. It is...”
– Ayn Rand, ‘Atlas Shrugged’ (via QuiteTom)
Dying.
I dont know how else to describe it but a death sentence. I don’t know if this makes everything better, knowing when one is dying or going to die. Does it buy a little more time to say goodbye? Does it help one to accept the harsh reality of life that no one can escape? Every minute of the day someone in the world probably dies, but when it is someone I know and love I do not quite know how...
“May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope...”
– Neil Gaiman (via wordpainting)
“‘have you ever had the experience,’ leon continued, ‘of finding, in a book, some...”
– gustave flaubert, madame bovary (via katedfisher)
boomshakalaka08 asked: have you started listening to angst-y music yet?
Only the start
The faster it starts, the quicker it ends. Or does it?
On a sidenote, I won’t start something I can’t finish anymore.
December 2010
22 posts
1/1/11
2010 had been all kinds of wonderful, and I must admit I am sorry to see it go. But still, here’s to wishing 2011 would bring lovely surprises and an amazing start to a new decade. Happy new year everyone!