February 2012
14 posts
Thin thread.
Money
For right now, I just need the boyfriend to tell me that money isn’t everything. We have each other and that is enough, we will make it enough.
Midnight
In the past I used to not like going out late at night then going home alone. It made me feel oddly alone and kind of depressed, which sounds too melodramatic but for a lack of a better word.
But recently going home late at night, I feel safe. Warm. At ease.
The weirdest things happen when you are twenty three.
The boyfriend and I are still trying to fix for-our-future plans. I feel...
Dreaming of buying bow ties
Morning train to work.
I woke up feeling unbalanced today, I know something in my dreams was bugging at me but just have no idea what it was.
Until I was browsing blogs and reading how someone had just gotten engaged, and remembered.
I dreamt I told my parents I was going to bring the boyfriend to meet them. When we were going to a relative’s wedding.
I think maybe what made me...
Secrets
Sometimes keeping things too much to myself makes me ever so frustrated and I feel like a huge fuzz ball of emotions. Icky, unwelcome emotions. But then, who to tell it to? I feel like a burden, like I am intruding, or as if my secrets are going places because girlfriends have a tendency to share everything with their boyfriends, or like I am over exposing myself and increasing my own...
SO MUCH FRUSTRATION
“I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, then all at once.”
– John Green, The Fault in Our Stars (via anditslove)
Valentine's Day Part II
In some strange turn of events I am wearing granny clothing in the photo, but anyhow. I felt almost sure the boyfriend will send me another vase of flowers, so told him we shall not celebrate Valentine’s this year. But he is always my little Valentine, and I only wish we could have at least the day to be with each other.
Happy Valentine my sweetheart. Remember one year ago today the...
Distance
This distance thing. I wish I could say it gets easier with time, that somehow we would get accustomed to being apart and that we would slowly be okay with missed anniversaries and screen dates, but it doesn’t. It doesn’t get any easier.
January 2012
18 posts
I hardly know what to do in a situation like this. It bothers me but I dont know how to fix it, and what is there left to do but to leave it as it is? But it feels like it is nagging at me, it is eating me up and I resent you for making me feel this way.
I will never forget what you said.
Photo stories
Thank you for taking the ugly, angry and mopey parts of me and loving me anyway.
You have no idea how much you mean to me, and how you pick me up constantly.
The one that is
I have tickets to go see my boy, yes to glorious days ahead.
I am so lucky to be in love with my best friend and my soul mate.
I like being alone, but I hate the feeling of being lonely. When you’re alone, you have time for yourself. Your thoughts finally catch up to you. You set your mind on things and everything is just clearer. Nothing’s bothering you and everything just feels right for once. When you feel lonely, you feel as if no one’s there for you. It feels like no one understands you or is willing to listen. It...
For you,
You know, if I could, I would wish that we can take away all the heartache and heartbreak from the world.
The broken tears and the lost hope and the raw bewilderment that something is lost forever.
This is a generalisation, but why is it that it is always the couples who seemed perfect for one another; the couple who were sickly sweet and whom everyone else was envious of, that don’t...
musikcrazed:
Vanilla Twillight. Owl City
Hello two thousand and twelve
Two thousand and eleven was a year of many things, but it was mostly falling in love with you.
In January, you wished me happy new year at the stroke of my midnight, and I remembered smiling into my phone, wondering what an old friend’s visit and a six hour conversation could lead to.
In February, we decided to vacation together on a whim. You confessed that you were afraid of losing...
December 2011
6 posts
All I want for Christmas...
I miss you. You being here this time did more for us than the past two trips could do, I got to enjoy the mundane everyday things other couples take for granted. We played house and we cooked and baked cookies; we took turns washing the dishes and you helped me with chores; we watched a cliched holiday movie (New Year’s Eve) which I loved and you dismissed as meh, we went shopping and I...
Happy things
Boyfriend sent me a box of adorable stationery a week ago as a surprise, and I took half of it to my office to put it around my desk. He stuck sticky notes on every single thing in the box, including his letter, and it made me smile so much just to read the things he wrote.
So incredibly lucky.
And because the roses have all wilted save for one I am pressing, I used the vase to store all...
Detachment
The worse thing is wanting someone so badly and wishing for him to love me back but he remains so unaffected and immovable and no matter what I say or what I can do he is still forever distant and away and I feel like this is eating at me and I don’t know how to make it stop.
November 2011
16 posts
Feeling stressed beyond belief. I would like to be away from all obligations and worries and this heavy weight pressing on my chest and just retreat into my quiet place and be alone and remember how to breathe again.
That you are my whole world
Tonight is one of those nights when I miss you a little more than usual,and I let the distance between us get to me more than it should.
I say this so much but still I will say it all the same. Yes I miss you, honest and true. Sometimes it is difficult to remember what we are working for and that something we have to look forward to when all I can think about is right now you are this far away...
“It’s lovely to know that the world can’t interfere with the inside of your head.”
– Angela’s Ashes, Frank McCourt (via wrists)
